December 2, 2009

growing up

There are so many warnings, writings, support groups, etc about the "terrible two's" - I remember dreading the second birthday of my son, and looking with hope to the third one convincing myself the age of "rebellion" would be over - yeah right!
Now that my son is approaching three, here comes the age of independence. As he grows I see how he is no longer the baby that would explore the world, but not too far from mommy's sight.
He goes to school (doesn't cry anymore and looks forward to it), seeks to have his own time and has his own opinion about foods, clothes, naps, bed time - you name it!
As I see him "fight" any and every "request" from mommy, I am also glad he is coming to have his own thoughts and express his own wants and dislikes.
It is tough when his dislikes is something he needs to do, or something we have no control over.
Recently, my son's dad and I came to a decision to modify the schedule for our son's sake. It was hard to finally come to that decision, but it is working out better for our kid and his anxiety is slowly disappearing.
I thank God that a kid that age can be clear about his/her fears. I thank God we were able to listen and take a positive action.
So, the title is growing up. I meant the parents are growing up. I think we slowly moved from crashing the horns to move our ears to our kid.
I know there are though moments ahead, but I do pray we keep on growing up.

I encourage you to listen. To stop and ask how things are going - even from a 2 year old - to provide a safe environment for our kids to talk - to forget a little bit about ourselves and let them feel comfortable to tell us what is going on in their hearts - to be a parent first and a friend second - to be what they need.

Now that the Holidays are here, and maybe you find yourself in an unexpected place, or a place that doesn't make your heart rejoice - let's set other expectations, in which our kids come first. Let's set new traditions that make them feel at home and that truly is not the end of the world, but their world and ours continue - and move forward :)

Blessings to you in this season - make the most of them! and look at your kids, a long loving look, go past their eyes so they know that you care for their heart.

Love your kids today and Merry Christmas!